bad headache. didn't practice on fri. but droped off my testing form for 2 dan shinsa. not sure if i'll pass, but it's about time i test for 2 dan. the boys' cousins dropped by over the weekend. ethan and aidan loved it. we went to the subdivision playground. aidan picked up a stick, and tested it against his hand then he started walking off. i asked him where he was going. he said.. 'i'm going to go and kill some spiders..'.. sigh..

been out of dojo for some time. went back to it last week. friday's practice was rather hard. this week, i was at the dojo last night. no friday pracitce. last night's practice was rather fun. we had ton of new beginners. apparently, the recruit effort made on sunday night worked. we had about 20 new people. we didn't have enough spare shinai to cover everyone. we split the group in two and went over basics. i wonder how many will return next week.

too damned tired..

ok.. i'm finally too damned tired. not of kendo.. but physically i'm out of juice. i like kendo as every, i might even say i love it. it's just great budo. just that i'm running out of energy. it might be that my diabete is not under control.. but it is. it might be lack of sleep due to my shift.. but i'm getting good 6 hrs of sleep a day.. i don't know what it is.. but i'm out of energy and i'm just not getting it to where i need to be. oh.. by the way the nidan test is out. no money.

oh well.. the picture is not big, but this is from our last 'yearly' dojo team taikai. i lost every single match that day, but then again, that's nothing unusual. seriously thinking about not taking test of nidan this june. two things. one i suck. i don't think i'm good enough for nidan. two.. i don't have energy. on days when i'm feeling better and has some energy, i seem to do better. but last few months has been hell. last time i had enough energy to look half way ok was during my vacation. three money. it will be rather expensive testing. if i fail, i'll be just throwing that money away. if i pass, i'm passing rank that i do not deserve. too many good reason not to test for nidan..

something i scanned. old pix.

last friday.

i've been going against our new sensei more often now days. he definitly has different style than our old sensei. and he is much older. he has more physically active style. on friday, i was doing ji-geiko against him and he was keep raising his both arms. it didn't click on me until few days later that he was giving me an opening to do.. urgh. i guess i'm still slow as hell. it didn't click for 3 days that he was giving me an opening. and here i thought he was going to jodan on that last min. i need to pay more attention. also he was showing kakarigeiko to one of the beginner which i have not seen before. i think that new kakarigeiko might help me and other other dojo that i go to. it's more extensive then the usual kakarigeiko that we have been doing. it includes do uchi. also noticed that koto shinai i have been using is way more tiring that dobari shinai. but my dobari shinais are shot. the new one snapped at the tip, and the old one had it. it's coming apart. time for more shinais.

lesson from the tourney.

here is the problem. the tourney is great, but it's not the end of kendo. more important thing is not to win the tourney, but to show graceful kendo during promotion test. apparently, one of sempai failed nidan test because he didn't have crisp cut dring the shimsa. i need to remember that. also from what i heard, he allowed the aite to control the match. i need to work on crisp cut, and making sure i'm the one in control at all time. out of all the matches that i have seen, one that impressed me most was my sensei's matches. he is just totally in control. nothing seems to shake him. and when he see the opening, he is there. very solid, very simple, very beautiful, and graceful.. something that is light years ahead of where i am. need to keep that picture in my head so i can have good role model. all these jumping around might look good and exciting, but the true kendo is supposed to be calm and solid. if i can not do that, then i'm already lost. 平常心. that's our dojo motto.. and i need to keep that in mind.